Missing you all!!!

Another Saturday! This week past much faster, guess that the reason is I was much busier!!!Just came back from visiting ToLan's mum!!! They are heading back to Vietnam now!Thank God for her health and I pray for a safe trip ahead! And I pray that You will smooth their path and spare her mum of all the complications!!!I still think that her mum recovering from cancer and getting high chance of complete cure is totally a miracle! When people talk about cancer, they usually talk about prolonging, yet curing! When I myself think of cancer, I dont think of a way out, but just a longer way before someone has to face the dead end!!! But as I'm typing this line, I remember yesterday Tham and I saw this verse HUGELY lighted up at Tang: "With God all things are possible" (Matt 19:26)!(We were wondering whether the owner of Tang just found Jesus)!YupYup!!!Even though her mum is not a Christian, I believe that my prayer reached God, who is abounding in love and mercy!And He is the one who can transform your life and my life from the inside out!!!
Walking along Orchard yesterday made me feel so excited about Christmas!!! Because this will be the first time I REALLY celebrate Christmas in Christ, with full understanding and appreciation for God's love, and with my church friends!!! Surely we will be having loads of fun!!!Cant wait for it man!!!But at the same time, it made me miss home so much!!! I miss the feeling of celebrating the coming of a new year with mommy and daddy and big bro and my doggies!!!I miss the way mommy harps on about all sorts of stuff again and again, which used to get on my nerve quite often last time!!! But now I miss it terribly!!!I miss the way I can hug daddy so tightly that I can smell his scent of cigarette (I told JLou yesterday that I didnt know when I would trust a guy as much as my dad, so that I could hug him!haha!!sounds funny!!!but really really! She told me that my boy friend will be miserable!And I'm still considering whether I should have a boy friend or not!!!)! I miss the way my bro irritates me then sweet talking me right after!!! And my sick Doggies!!! Get well soon!!!I realize that home is not just a place and family is much more than familiar faces!That sometimes, busy life occupies me so much that the hole in my heart seems to disappear. No wonder it gave me a shock when I suddenly had this urge to cry out loud (last time I did cry in Geog lecture out of the blue when I missed my bro so much, and consequently scaring XiuXiu to death!!!)!The fact that I dont let myself time to think about certain things or release certain emotions doesnt mean that they all wil go away or I will forget about them!!! They are just accumulating, waiting for a chance to explode!!!And I'm amazed by the amount of emotions a human being can store up before finally letting go!!!I just want my family badly!!!
On a side note, received email from XiuXiu!!!haha!!!smart girl!!Miss XiuXiu, Ngan, Chop, and Che!!!All come back soon please!!!
And tmr will accompany Tham to adult service!!!May be I can go double service!!!Tham, still praying for you!!!Be STRONG!!!(and I self-appointed me to be your financial manager/assistant next year!!! I'm serious!!!)
Taking a nap now! My eye bags are bigger than ever!!!

And I'm tired!!!

Such a tiring day!!!I just discovered that there was a HUGE pile of work waiting for me!!!I know no one can die more than once, but every time my prof explains the project to me, he practically bombs me with so many work that I feel like dying again and again!!! (Haha and Vincent got bombed too!!! At least someone is suffering with me!!!)
But God always has something better for me in store to brighten up my day!!! Went to Raja to take JessSher's note/letter or wadvr you call it and met Tham!!!Okay!!!You brought me terrible news lah!!!But really had a great time catching up with you! It sounds funny since we live in the same boarding, we meet in church every week!But really really, only today I realize that it has been a long time since I last sat down, just talking to you about STUFF you know!!! YupYup!!! Great quality time man!!! Dont be too sad ah Tham!!! Keep behaving nicely and we will keep praying for you k!!! (And remember our church service at 9 k!!!) And remember that you will soar with God in all storms!!! AND I DO THINK THAT YOU ARE REAL BRAVE!!!!!!!
Tmr I need to go to work early cos there is a deadline to meet!!! And somehow I feel that lack of sleep will just screw my concentration level up!!!Like today, i kept saving all my files under the wrong names for like half an hour before I even realized it!!! And I had to open every single file, compare and contrast and Basically,redid the whole thing!!! (And thanks for my lab partner who keeps reminding me of my big eyebags! So much that I do feel that they are really big now!!!)
Need to sleep!!!!
Bye friends

P/S: JessSher, thanks for your nonsense note!!!haha!!!Quite amusing!!! And Vincent!Thank God that you went to church k!!! Should go church more often so later you can bring your children to church as well!!!

Finally its Saturday!!!

I cant be more thankful that I finally have a day off!!!For this past week, everyday wake up at 7 and reach home at 11 (or even plus, thankfully that the guards were nice, otherwise I would have been locked out!!!)! SprDpr tiring!!! So far my attachment gets more and more headache!!!But its pretty fun, I guess mainly cos my partner is NICE!!!haha!!! He's from MJ, and as vocal as me!!! So we kinda feel very comfortable talking to each other!!!But i'm very scared that after 5 weeks at NTU rite, I will become like my professor, who opens like a trizillion tab at the same time, and consequently takes like half a day to figure out which one is the correct one!!!!Yesterday, after SprDpr long hours staring at the computer in the hope of analyzing certain patterns and trends of the figures, I couldnt be more blur!!! The result was detrimental!!!haha!!!There was this guy working in the same lab as me! When I was stone in front of the com, he came to me introducing his name! It took me a few seconds to realize that he was introducing himself!!!And that's not the best of me k!!! He was wearing a tshirt with this BIG headline SIMTECH (SimTech is the institute I'm attached to), and I looked straight at him asking whether he's working in SIMTECH!!!Right after my words came out of my mouth, I realized how dumb I was, and tried to cover up for myself by telling him he looked like uni student so I thought he was probably from NTU!!!Ahh!!!Dont know what he will think of RJC student now!!! Dumb blonde?No common sense?haha!!!
Let me recap my highlights of the week!!!
Wed: Farewell dinner for XiuXiun with JessSher, Dawny and XiuXiu before she left for Thailand!!!I was late for like 1hour plus!!!Dawny should be SprDpr pissed cos she came the earliest!!!Sorry everyone!!!!!We ate instant noodle and ice cream!!!hahah!!!SprDpr funny! We totally looked like well-dressed homeless kids, sharing instant noodle near Cold Storage (if not to mention quite near the toilet)!!! Cant be more embarassing!And cant be more fun as well!!!Jess could only join us for ice cream cos her mum doesnt let her out much these days!!!Poor Jess!!!(But you are not that poor you know, cos you have JEsus!!!)! I still remember Dawny Cheng pointed at a mango and shouted "There!!!Papaya!!!"!!!! Haiz!!!!Someone never goes groceries shopping!!!And Sher told us she was wearing her lowest heels, which were like our possibly highest heels!!!Cheating shoes ah Sher!!!Hope that XiuXiu is enjoying her Thailand trip now!!!!
Thu: Celebrated Corn bdae!!!And i was on time!!!Its kinda a surprise for him!!!And Tham and Joshua forced him to wear kinda ridiculous outfit to walk around Marina Square!!!haha!!!Cant remember the name of the restaurant where we had dinner, but we waited like 2 hours (I'm serious!!!!) for the food cos they basically ran out of almost everything!!!But the uncle there quite nice to us, especially the bdae boy!!!haha!!!We had a really good time!!!It always feels very warm to hang around with my church friends!!!Like I dont need to be anything but myself!!!
Fri: Wanted to catch a movie with Vincent (my NICE lab partner) but couldnt!!! So we ended up just eating and shopping around!!! And I bought a pair of jeans for Ngan for her trip to Australia tmr!!!Very pretty and at amazing price!!!haha!!!Both Vincent and I got quite excited over the Levi's deal (trade your own jeans for a $50 Levi's voucher!!!)!!!But guess that I need to save money and I already have enough jeans!!!
Sat (today): slacking at home!!!!!!!!ahhhhhh!!!!This feels grrrreaaatttt!!!!!
AND TMR IS CHURCH!!!!!!!!

7 months in the Faith!!!

Time flies!!!I've never experienced this feeling of powerlessly letting time passing through the very tip of my fingers, without being able to grab it, hold it back, and control it!!!
It's certainly a great Joy to mark the seventh month I've been in God and to think about the many more days, and months and years to come with Him by my side!!!Sometimes it's hard to imagine who I had been before God found me by His Grace!!!Just a normal student, a normal daughter, and a normal friend, who thought that all she would need in life is the Joy brought from making people around her happy; from stretching a smile as wide as a string across her face in all situations and pretending that things somehow would turn out to be alright. I spent all my time trying to be that person I thought I had been created to be! And I was happy, my family was happy, and my friends were happy!I didn't know how much I had been missing till the day I was caught totally amazed in God's love, and rendered utterly speechless in His Mercy!He had filled the Heart shape in my heart! When I was small, I always asked questions like: why was there mountain? who created the very first creature on Earth? why do human beings look the way they do? When I got a bit older, I truly believed that there was a God, or at least a higher authority, whose job is to arrange things the way they needed to be arranged so that people would be in the right place at the right time. I sort of acknowledged God, but never thought that He would want to establish an intimate relationship with me, so badly that He even died on the cross for all my sins (all our sins)! It never occurred to me that the very same God, who created all things, would want to be with such an absolutely normal person like me! This very fact really turns my world up side down in a way that it entirely changes how I view myself, and the world I live in! That I do matter to Him, and so does the rest of the world! That no matter what life throws at me, I will rely on God to figure the way out because to live is a gift from God and life itself is Grace (by right, I would be dead with all my sins)! That no matter how wayward I have been in my walk with God, I can always run to His embrace full of Mercy and Forgiveness! That regardless of the many times I feel wary of living up to His words, He has never grown wary of listening to me harping on about my very own problems and even of me being angry with Him or doubting Him! That although I turned away from Him when I was hurt by things I never expected Him to allow, He never told me how much more it hurt Him to see me like that, yet patiently drawing me back to Him, and wholeheartedly trusting that I would do so!Now, if anyone asks me about the God I am worshiping, I can only answer by saying: BEYOND WORDS! It is because no words can describe the transformed lives each and everyone of us will experience when we let God take the lead! And it is also because each and everyone of us will experience that life very differently! No one will go through the same divine journey as anyone else!
The deeper I grow in God, the more struggles I face. Things which used to be alright for me to do now turns out to be not that okay with God in the picture. (like gossiping about people). The more I struggle, the more I realize there is a need for humble confession of my mistakes and an active willingness to make amendment for the wrongdoings, not in an attempt to erase them, but to let them count. I do believe that wrong exists for a reason: to remind us of what it is to be right. There is always a line to cross, and in my Christian life, God has made that line more and more visible than ever. But the amazing thing is that He asks me to reach to the other side: to the lost. One of my worst fear was that some how during the course of reaching out, I would let that line shift, I would be one among the many thousand lost sheep there, and when God looked, He would not be able to recognize me!Not long before, it came simply to me that it's my responsibility to spread His words to people, but it's His Grace that leads people to cross from death to life, and lets the lost be found!
I feel deeply grateful today! For everything!
And my prayer today is really this simple: Help me become a contagious Christian! The Lord be my guide! Amen!

Unbelievable!!!

I cant believe this!!! J1 is really ending soon!!! As soon as tmr, after OP, then practically no more stuff to worry about!!!Cant wait for OP to be over, yet cant imagine the prospect of not seeing everyone for like nearly 2 months!!! Today our PW group finally thankfully had a proper rehearsal as a whole group!!!And guess what??? I came to school at 830 just to steal a classroom for our class to rehearse!!! The only classroom left was the one with the door locked!!!So Lizhao and I climbed in through the window!!! See!!! That's what peopel can do when they are desperate!!! And we saw other groups in school as well, quite fun! Got to see lots of people after long break!!! (But XiuXiu and Dawn were not there)!!!Poor Xiu lost her phone!!! And Xiu, guess what!!! I lost my Bible on Sunday after church!!! So i kinda understand your feeling!!! Sayang k!!!I really hate losing stuff, especially things which contain memories, notes or mark certain turning points in my life!!! I really really cant stand it!!! I will grieve over it for like one whole month! Though I got a new bible yesterday, I still cant get used to it yet!!! (trust that God has a greater purpose for my lost Bible eh!!!)! Thanks JessSher for writing stuff for me so I can slowly love my Bible haha!!! Enough for grief!!!
Yesterday, JessSher and I went to Campus Crusade for sale!!! AHHHH!!! We were mesmerized there!!! like for over 2 hours!!! We kept going back and forth, pick up one book from another!!! But yesterday nite, when I was doing QT with my new cool bible, God reminded me that no matter what, I must always turn back to His words at the very end of the day!!! Other Christian books can be my reference, but only God's words are to be my ultimate guidance, on which I completely trust and which I wholeheartedly obey!!! Thank God for such sound teaching!!!
Oh!!! And I'm very excited that Pastor wanted me to serve next year!!! Ahhh!!! Of course I would like soooo much!!! (Though I have not told her that even I myself cant guarantee my coming to church next year!!!)!!! But Still!!! This is such a blessing from God!!! But I know there are challenges to come, surely!!! I pray that from now on rite, God will equip me with more and more biblical knowledge, strengthen my faith and shape me more and more into a Christ-like person!!! Whenever I feel scared of taking some new challenges, I remeber this quote (cant remember from whom): "God doesnt require you to succeed. He just asks you to try."!!!
YupYup!!!
A bit tired after a long dragging day of PW!!!I need to take a short nap now (and people who know me well enough know that my short nap isnt really that short!!!)!