God knows my name

I was reading about Mary Magdalene in the book of Mark. It was written about her experience of going to the tomb of Jesus, finding his body disappeared and encountering the real Jesus, resurrected. Being such a devoted follower of Jesus, Mary Magdalene witnessed his death on the cross when some of his disciples had run away or even denied him; and she even went to visit His tomb afterwards. So it would be extremely upset for her to find out that Jesus's body just disappeared as she assumed that someone had taken it away! Extremely upset and confused! And it never occurred to her that Jesus had already resurrected, so she mistook Him for the gardener. She didnt recognize Him until Jesus called her, by name "Mary".
It is somehow a very very moving scene to me. Jesus appeared in his disciple's confusion, fear, sadness and called her by name; and all of a sudden, the voice of Him calling out to her name stole the show. She burst out crying, the cry of joy that is for sure!!! How powerful is that voice! How powerful it is to know for sure that God knows our names! And everytime He calls out to us in such intimate manner, He calls our whole being!
He calls out to me when i see beggars on the street, when i travel and see for myself the breathtaking creation of His own hands, when i feel the rush of autum wind, when i look to the far end of the shore where the sky meets the sea, when i see a stranger's face radiated with smile and happiness, when i miss my moo, when i see my parents' grey hairs, suddenly realizing how much they have grown old and how much I have grown up, when i read about people dying of depression or countries with high divorce rate, when i look at myself in the mirror each morning, when it rains or shines. He calls out to me, every breathing living talking walking moment of my life. He calls me not only because He knows my name; rather He knows me.
So yes, I am never ever alone, regardless of whether i know it or not. But of course, i would like to know it. I would like to hear God's voice. And i have heard or have been taught of the many disciplines to train one into a better listener, concerning God's voice; those could be reading the bible more, spending more time in prayer, or spending more time in silence, and so on. It works, definitely. However, for me, personally, the fundamental of it all lies in the ability to free myself from all the things that i tend to be caught up in,and sometimes, it could be the very structure i set for my own spiritual growth, such as doing quiet time everyday, praying every alternative day and so on. Why am I structuring the ways that God can manifest himself to me? It should be the case that I read the bible because i like it, not because i feel the need to or my calendar says so. It should be the case that I pray because i like to talk to God, not because i feel guilty otherwise. According to my very own experience, structuring my encounter with God reduces my sensitivity to God's move in my life. Why? because structure tends to box my time with God when actually He is with me all time of the day.
Of course, i am not saying that we should abandon all disciplines and stuff like that. Go ahead with whatever you are doing to enrich your walk with God, but be in expectancy. The seemingly unimportant detail/event, He is going to be there, revealing profound truth.